HALIFAX DRIVING ADVENTURE

going to start today with the fact ... bad fact... that I have been awake for over 24 hours now... cept I had a power nap for maybe just under an hour this morning... and well this is going to lead to a bit of swearing and well bad manerisms but they shall entertain you none the less I'm sure.... well lets get started...

man am I ever tired and I can't go to fuking sleep because I have to be on my work schedule.. but to hell with work I'm going to sleep anyway in about 20 minutes.. anyway I"m driving along .. mom and brother are sorta sleeping and I hit an animal... what a start.. I know what your saying but no it's not true... the animal was already dead.. I just happend to make it even flatter..... I"m suprised I didnt' have to clean up any blood... but that's just the beginning.... continue driving

further down the road I"m flicking my high beams off cause a truck is coming in the opposite direction and out of fucking nowhere appears a fucking box... I have no idea what it was but it made a very loud clunk under the car... now that was skeery but it woke up my mom....... and what did she do?????? she fuckin grabbed my arm.... skeered the fukn crap outta me... thought I was gonna smak into the fukn mack truck.... anyway situation under control... continue driving......

get nearly all the way to halifax no problem and on the outskirts... what do I do??? I miss the fukn exit because the sign was all faded and couldn't be read... shit fukn shit so I turn around and go back 10 minutes to the last fuckn exit because there's no ramp on the other side to get on the fukn bridge... fine... come back get on the right exit... continue driving... go over the bridge and am looking at signs.. they are in the same lane... one says childrens emergency (the one I want to follow) and the other says adult emergency (happens to be in the same lane supposedly) I"m in this lane waiting for the childrens one to come back when this lane is turning and I can't switch lanes because traffic is backed up n shit.... so I take a wrong turn down the road... I turn the fuk around and get back on the road... and find out there's no left turn.. great so I keep going turn around again and finally can make the correct turn (that I didn't have to make in the first place) continue driving.....

get to the correct street and what do I do??? turn the wrong way.. but I got to see where dalhousie uni is.... great turn around go other way and amazingly get to where we need to be.... park car....

we arrive a bit early and well mom says wonderfull and early too.... I expected we would still be driving around trying to find this place.... (to which I reply.. but you weren't driving :P) anyway go in and find place to eat... great I go back to car and try to sleep.. can't fukn do it get in back seat... curl up... power nap.. next thing I know the car alarm is going off.. what the f...... ummm helll oops Hi mom... turn off the alarm and try to wake up... good job nearly shit my pants and swore in front of my mom and little brother (I'm a good boy remember)... anyway I'm not feeling so good... the breakfast we had isn't agreeing with me so I say I'm goin to the toilet before we set off again..... good bye breakfast..... continue driving...

well my brother seems to think he knows where we are and leads us in the wrong direction... (suprise suprise) so I turn around go back and go back the way we came.... and navigate to gas station... fill it up and continue driving..

can see the bridge we gotta get in but dont know how to get on it.. only signs I see are for something that starts with B.... dartmouth.... and cole harbour or some shithole.... so I remember seeing the sign for some shithole before and follow that one... suprise it takes me under the god damned fuking bridge.... so once again turn around and go back sadly this is where I managed to cut some guy off.. he was going about 2000 km/h the fucker deserved to get cut off I didn't see him then all of a sudden nearly hit the bastard.... but moving on I take the right exit this time..... (I'm such a great driver).... now go accross the bridge and theres a toll.. I didn't have any problem on the way in... but for some stupid reason I roll down my window.. and chuck the change with my left hand... ...... ............... (this is kinda funny) ..... ..... ..... ... the dude in the booth looks at me...... .... ........ I throw the change (already said that)........ and all three of the quarters hit the fucking wall...... then roll under the fucking car..... great I"m tired as it is.. the guy is looking at me trying not to laugh and or... call the cops.... so I hop out of the car and can only find one fucking quarter.... reach in the car for more change.. handful of dimes... and throw em in the bucket... the guy says they wont work.. great he reaches in the bucket and says hang on I'll get your change.. a whole nickel... I say no that's ok I just want to get going..... continue driving.....

no more problems till we get to port hawkesbury... we stop to get something to eat... yippie I'm feeling like shit (and tired too remember I lost my breakfast before started driving again) so we eat and guess what... continue driving....

getting out of port hellsbury.. I again manage to miss the fucking exit for sydney.. I must be really tired or something.... anyway drive back to glace bay and somehow dont kill us as speed demons keep passing us on the windy twisty road and my mom is going watch the road be carefull... then some asshole cuts into my lane coming toward us and nearly takes us all out ... as if my mom isn't skeered enough... and one final note then I'm going to sleep.... I jokingly say to mom.. wouldn't it be funny if I miss the bypass turnoff too?? she wasn't impressed oh well that was my adventure hope you would like to come for a ride with me sometime.. I'm a great driver just ask my family... they are getting out of the mental ward in a few weeks.... continue driving