so now I'm deep.... I can live with that.... and I'm not exactly scared lol at least not in the way yew mean lisa.... so perhaps I'll continue then..... the thing is how do yew know what direction to take when yew know it's time to change things.... that's the part that gets us all... with myself it's the fact that I think things through to much.... and just miss opertunities or find something that would be more suitable ... but by the time I get to that it's either too late or I've messed it up already... site by example.... recently I got asked to go in on a house with my dad.. he was gonna stay around but was broke and needed a job .... I thought about it but circumstances would not make it a good thing for me to concider... course now he has decided to go back out west and I probably wont see him for quite some time.... I was scared to make the choice for a couple of reasons (I wont be sharing them here) but the problem was that I sat and thought about it a bit too much.... though sadly I think I made the right decision... will just have to live with concequences... but that's life isnt' it..... though it would have been fun for a little while... brings me to a funny story years ago.... was out to the bar with a good friend of mine and his brother.... as we did at the time drove around town afterwards (brother didn't drink and liked to drive ladies home afterwards.. he's a perv lol) anyway no different here we drive along and he sees someone he knows and offers her a ride... so pick her up and get to her place.. she conciders offering us to come in (I think she is married and I'm thinkin I'll be walking home lol) when she says to him that if he's to come in he needs to get her some pizza cause she's hungry.... so she's looking around the mini van sitting in the back next to me ... and she's like yeah yew all can come in if yew go get me some pizza... I dont know what it was (because of my poor memmory) but as she's getting out she turns to me and says... hhmmm yewr a thinker aren't yew... I'm like ummm I spose lol... at the time it was sort of a shot at me .. because of the discussion they were having... and well it was funny at the time but I never forgot it because well it's true.... anyway on with the story .. (that line was the only thing that is making me tell this story by the way lol) anyway she goes on in her place and rubbing his hands.. brother starts the van and drives off to the pizza store sayin were' getting some tonight.. and I'm rolling my eyes laffin silently at them .. yewr not getting anything she just ditched yer asses.... so he goes in gets 2 slices... (I spose one for her and one for him) and we go back to her place.. just before we're pulling in the drive there's a truck pullin in before us... no doubt the husband or boyfriend I was thinking lol.... and he slows down..... decides fuk it I'm getting mine she told me to come back ..... park in the drive and he gets out with his wrapped up pizza .. I stay in the van... and their like yew comin... I said if yew get to open the door I'll come in lol.... so he knocks on the door.. no answer... knocks again... suprise no answer.... and he says well she might have passed out.... and I say or yew missed getting yer jollies getting pizza lol.... so he gets all pissed off and drives us all home... seen him the next day and asked him how his pizza was.. he jumped in his van and tore up the driveway .. I think he was a bit mad lololol... oh well perhaps if he had thought it through a bit things would have turned out differently.... sometimes that's a good thing... so I dont mind being a "thinker" as the lady put it lol but if yew mull over an idea or thought too much it just becomes a bit much and causes you to either miss some option because your pondering over other things instead of realizing their true potential... advice.. stick to the facts and move on with the decision that gets you where yew would be happiest.... course it may not be the correct decision but that's why we learn from our mistakes... enjoy and good night.. gotta finish watchin my new mewvy's lol too much thought going on here for one night.....